Divorce and Graphotherapy
Posted by Diana Mercer on Mon, Dec 05, 2011 @ 01:27 AM
Divorce and Graphotherapy
Guest blog post by Sheila Lowe, MS www.sheilalowe.com
Divorce sucks. No point denying it. Whether you’ve grown to hate the person you once loved or the parting is amicable, when it comes to ending it all, you still have to grieve for the hopes and dreams you once shared. It’s stressful, it’s painful, and there are plenty of difficult feelings to deal with. But there is a way to make some of it just a little bit easier.
In my work as a handwriting analyst, I’ve found that people in stressful situations such as divorce have been helped by doing a few simple exercises called graphotherapy. Some exercises help difficult emotions come to the surface for release. Others help the brain to focus and attend better, so that when you’re filling out all that paperwork and figuring out who gets what, you won’t miss any important details.
Graphotherapy works because everything you’ve ever done or thought or said remains in your brain, and when you pick up a pen and write, the way you’ve responded to all your life experiences and integrated them into your personality is translated into the trail of ink you leave on the paper.
Your handwriting is unique to you—after all, you’re the only one who’s had your particular set of experiences. Over time, as you grow and change, your handwriting also changes. Temporary changes occur, too. You’ve probably noticed that when you’re under stress, your handwriting looks somewhat different than when you’re relaxed. So it is correct to say that handwriting will reflect your state at the time you write it, and graphotherapy is an easy, effective means to change your state.
In addition to the exercises, writing positive statements such as, “I release all negative thoughts and judgments of others,” or, “I like who I am around other people,” anchors the thoughts you are expressing with the behavior (the graphotherapy exercises), and creates new neural pathways in your brain. Adding music provides another level of anchoring and results in actual changes in brain function, making the new behaviors last.
There are numerous and varied graphotherapy exercises, but for our purposes we’ll select some that help with alertness, concentration and memory (those in the left column), and some for relaxing and bringing out creativity (those in the right column).
Choose one or two exercises to copy, depending on what you feel you need most at the time. Now, find a comfortable area to seat yourself, with a large, flat writing space and enough room to move your arms freely. Play music in the background as you do the exercises. Vivaldi’s Four Seasons and Pachelbel’s Canon are good choices. Close your eyes and listen to the music for at least sixty seconds, at the same time visualizing yourself having successfully completed what you want to accomplish.
Now, open your eyes and take a deep cleansing breath to the count of 1-2-3-4-5 and then let it all out 1-2-3. Next, fill a sheet of paper with each exercise you’ve chosen. Use lined or graph paper in order to make the drawings consistent (but don’t try to make them perfect). When you’ve done several rows of exercises, write some affirmations that support your goals. Keep at it for about ten minutes. When you’re finished you’ll find you’re more relaxed and centered.
I’ve seen some amazing results when clients have tried graphotherapy, and I use it myself when I’m in a bad place. I’d love to hear your experiences if you decide to give it a try: sheila@sheilalowe.com
Sheila Lowe, MS is a handwriting analyst and published author with more than 40 years experience. She testifies in cases where signatures or other handwriting are called into question. Www.sheilalowe.com